Conflict Resolution

 

Finding equilibrium in everyday life can be a challenge. Sometimes conflict occurs and it can be harmful to the people around you and to yourself.  Having the ability to control your emotions can be a powerful tool.  When I think about a recent conflict with a co-worker, I realize my emotions are a factor in the resolution not going as well as I expected.  My own biases of my opinions, set my emotions in a tail spin, and this is when voices may be raised or words may be said that should not be said.

The center for non-violence communication explains how communication can affect relationships, if strategies are used to ensure conflict and is handled in a civil way.  One strategy I have implemented when faced with conflict, is to remove myself from the situation before saying something I regret.  This can help me to calm down and find a balance before confronting someone.  I also have been trying to focus on the issue rather than my position on the issue.  Finally, I have tried to implement the idea of staying focused on the present no the past.  These tips are helping me deal with everyday conflict at home with my son and with colleagues in the work place.

References: 

The Center for Nonviolent Communication. (n.d.). The center for nonviolent communication. Retrieved from http://www.cnvc.org/

• • Foundations of NVC
  • NVC Model
  • NVC Concepts

Communication

This week in our communication class we were to take self-evaluations in regards to anxiety and verbal aggressiveness.  Then, I asked two acquaintances to evaluate me in regards to anxiety and verbal aggressiveness.  The evaluations from my self-evaluations and their evaluations were quit similar.  The scores came back within a few numbers different from each other and ranged within the same brackets.  It revealed that I show mild signs of anxiety in communicating and it stated that I am not concerned with communication.  This would be an accurate statement that I feel towards communication. The evaluation of the verbal-aggression reflected that I am respectful of others and their opinions without attacking them verbally. This I feel is also an accurate statement of how I feel I communicate with those whom may disagree with me. 

As I studied this week’s information in communication, I realized I truly did not understand what the words self-concept, self-esteem, and self-efficacy truly meant.    I now understand that self-concept is when you truly understand yourself in terms of your strengths and weaknesses.  Self-esteem is the way you feel about yourself, and self-efficacy is the prediction of your success in situations (confidence) (O’Hair & Wiemann, 2012).  I have realized that over the past five years I have increased my self-awareness, self-efficacy, in understanding what my strengths and weaknesses are.  I have also realized that when you are working in a field that hones in on your strengths then you seem to have more self-confidence and the ability to complete the job at hand comes naturally, providing self-confidence.  I try and help my own children learn what their strengths and weaknesses are because my hope is that they chose a career that capitalizes on their strengths.

References

O'Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real communication. New York: Bedford/St. Martin's.

Communicating and the strategies used

         “If instead of focusing on yourself you first think of others,” (Gonzalez-Mena, 2010, p.38).  This is the attitude I try to live with and what I think about on a daily bases.  Since I have begun my master’s program, I have been noticing a difference in the way I see things.  I look at my own biases and realized how different I am.  I remind myself that I may not understand someone’s situation and if I judge them then I am expressing cultural myopia. (O'H air & Wiemann 2012).   I feel that as I mature as a communicator, I can identify when the other person whom I am communicating with is different from me.  Whether it is a person who is socially different, ethnically different or their values are different from mine.  So, when I think of the question, do I find myself communicating differently with people from different groups/cultures? The answer is yes, and I feel the biggest difference is being aware of my own biases and actions and then applying more empathetic listening and understanding.  For example, I was around a coworker who was asking questions about a particular family in regards to a child she had been observing.  This professional started making assumptions of the family and the environment in which the child was around because of the way she was acting.  I noticed this judgment and tried to explain my compassion for the child and that it was not my job to make these inferences.  

The three strategies I now use to communicate more effectively are:

·         Have true empathy for the families or individuals I am communicating with.

·         Do not judge the individuals I am speaking with.

·         Listen, rather than talking, when someone is communicating with me, whether it be verbal or non-verbal communication. 

References

Gonzalez-Mena, J. (2010). 50 strategies for communicating and working with diverse families. Upper Saddle River, NJ: Pearson Education, Inc.

O'Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real Communication an Introduction. Boston, New York: Bedford/ St. Masrtin's.

Week 2

As I watched the show Revenge with the sound turned off, which I have never seen before, I can tell in the first five minutes of the show that there are relationships that have secrets.  They were communicating by nonverbal eye brow rising, whispering to one another, and looking very seriously at one another.  In the show I could tell there were two main characters.  It was hard to tell which one was being portrayed as the good one and which one was the bad one.  As the show progressed, there was small talk at social parties and you could still tell by their body language that there were secrets.You could tell that the young lady in the show was new to the area and may have been feeling nervous.  As I observed her interacting with people at a party, she was very quiet and held her glass of wine tight.  Some of the other characters were portrayed as rich and their actions and activities portrayed a arrogant attitude.

I then turned on the volume and concluded that most of my assumptions were true.  My assumption that they were wealthy was true, and the assumption that they had secrets between them was also true.  Without hearing them speak I was not able to pick up on the fact that the main character was there for revenge.  Their body language was portraying something secretive, but without hearing them speak I could not understand what exactly was going on. When I heard the conversation, I could then understand the plot of the story.  O’Hair & Wiemann, explain peoplet-oriented listeners.  They are listeners with relationships in mind and are able to listen in a non-judgmental way (O’Hair & Wiemann, 2012).    I feel I am this type of listener and this is why when I turned the volume up I able to relate what was going on in the story.  My interest was piqued to find out what the relationships were like in the story.

I feel if I tried this activity with a show that I know well my assumptions would have been more correct. I would have known the characters qualities and relationships and would have been able to follow the nonverbal communication with a better understanding.  

Reference

 O’Hair, D. & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real communication. New York: Bedford/St. Martin’s.

 

Communication and Collaboration

Hello everyone,
I am looking forward to working with everyone.